Shemos

The following verse (Shmos 1,7) describes the prolific birth rate of the Jews of Egypt. “The children of Israel were fruitful and fertile, increased and became strong-very, very much; and the land became filled with them.” Rashi comments that the six adjectives allude to the fact that births of sextuplets were common. If the Jews were so abundant, isn’t it obvious that the land became filled with them?

The Maharil Diskind zt”l offers the following insight. The syndrome of hatred and persecution between Yaakov and Eisav is precipitated by the Jew losing his unique identity and adopting the values of the surrounding cultures. As long as we are proud and faithful to our traditional values, the gentile will respect us and even protect our rights and privileges. This is alluded to in Hashem’s promise to Avraham Avinu (Genesis 15,13), “Know for sure that your descendants will be foreigners, in a land that is not theirs.” Our status as foreigners in exile is not enough to incite our enemies’ enmity. However, when we abandon the security of our faith and tradition and adopt values of the land that is not ours, then the Galus oppression begins. If the Children of Israel would have remained in Goshen (technically, Goshen belonged to the Jews because it was Pharaoh’s gift to our matriarch Sara), living in accordance with their own customs, the Egyptians would have granted the Jews the same religious freedom that the tribe of Levi enjoyed. However, once the people ventured out to the broader Egypt, to the land which was not theirs, the oppression began. Now we can understand the seemingly superfluous words in Exodus, “and the land became filled with them.” It describes how the prolific people filled greater Egypt and began to adopt the foreign culture. The verse that follows, “A new king arose in Egypt,” is therefore appropriate. It was the fall of the walls of the gilded ghetto of Goshen that was the catalyst for the new Pharaoh’s hatred.

The Bais Halevi zt”l understands the phenomenon of anti-Semitism, not as a punishment, but as a fail-safe protection for the Jewish People. The Almighty said, “I have separated you from the nations.” This separation guards and protects our special national character. When we begin to lose our special status and assimilate the values of the Goyim, Hashem inspires their hatred in order to force us into seclusion, re-establishing our separate and protective milieu.

The prophet Yirmiyahu expresses a similar thought. “And you, oh plundered one, what will you do? If you wear scarlet, if you don a golden ornament, if you paint your eyes with mascara, you will be beautifying yourself in vain. Your lovers have come to detest you, they seek your life (Yirmiyahu 4, 30).” The prophet describes the natural reaction of the Galus Jew - beautifying himself in the eyes of the Goyim, adorning himself with secular and contemporary values and ornaments, for the sole purpose of finding favor in their eyes. Yirmiyahu cries out, “You will be beautifying yourself in vain,” because these very innovations and foreign adaptations will cause the Goyim to hate us! “Eisav hates Yaakov,” the Goyim hate the down-trodden Jew who forsakes his national treasures. However, “Eisav loves Yisroel,” we are respected and admired when we are the princes of Hashem and proudly raise the banner of Torah and Mitzvos.

Rav Meir Shapiro zt”l incisively commented on the Jewish American scene. “They know how to make Kiddush, but they aren’t proficient in Havdalah.” We American Jews appreciate spirituality and sanctity but are challenged when we have to separate and draw a clear line of demarcation between the Goyim and us. We take liberties that compromise the very essence of our spiritual nature. We may certainly enjoy the many financial and educational benefits of the surrounding society. However, we must be staunch in preserving our spiritual dignity and halachic standards at the same time. If we are successful in this endeavor we will merit the Pasuk in Vaeschanan 4,6, “You shall safeguard and perform them, for it is your wisdom and discernment in the eyes of the nations, who shall hear all these decrees and who shall say, ‘Surely a wise and discerning people is this great nation’.”

The Magen Avraham (Orach Chaim, Siman 685) tells us that one should utilize the time period between the parshios of Shemos until Mishpatim for Teshuva and spiritual rejuvenation. (Shovavim is the Hebrew acronym for the parshios of Shemos until Mishpatim). Our constant and arduous battle with the yetzer harah demands that we familiarize ourselves with his many subterfuges and tactics.

In the bracha Yaakov Avinu bestowed upon Shimon and Levi it says, “In their desire they maimed an ox.” Shimon & Levi sought to uproot Yosef, who is figuratively likened to an ox. The question arises: When Yosef was challenged by the wife of Potifar, an apparition of Yaakov appeared to help Yosef resist temptation, however, when the tribes sold Yosef, no apparition was provided. Why? The answer says the Admor Rav Yisroel Eliezer Hopstien of Koshnitz zt”l lies in the words of Yaakov Avinu. “In their desire they maimed (Yosef) the ox.” When the shevatim sold Yosef they did not feel that they were grappling with their yetzer harah. To the contrary, they sold Yosef with “desire” and without compunction. Yosef, on the other hand, was cognizant that it was wrong to consort with the wife of Potifar. He therefore, merited divine assistance in overcoming his yetzer harah.

The Gemarah in Succah (52b) says “everyday the evil inclination is “misgaber” i.e. entices and is “mischadesh” i.e. renews itself in enticing man to sin. The Vilna Gaon interprets the double expression as follows, “if the yetzer harah does not succeed in enticing a person to commit sin, he will renew his attempt and camouflage the sin in the veil of a mitzvah with the hope that the person will eagerly comply.” Rav Chaim Volozhin zt”l brings another source for the yetzer harah’s practice of camouflaging sin. “The yetzer harah is similar to a fly and positions himself between the two chambers of the heart (Brachos 61a).” The left side is classically associated with evil and the right side with righteousness. The yetzer harah does not relegate his position to the side of evil alone but also resides in the side of goodness, hiding behind a facade of justice and rectitude. Once we “desire” to perform the will of the yetzer harah, abandoning our struggle with evil, we preclude any hope of divine assistance in our battle with evil’s designs.

The Vilna Gaon and Rav Meir Shapiro offer the following acid test to determine the true inspiration of a mitzvah. “If an opportunity to perform a mitzvah arises, and one feels an unchallenged and powerful urge to perform the mitzvah, this is a sign that the yetzer harah is sponsoring this mitzvah. If, however, a mitzvah comes with struggle and adversity, this is a sign that it is inspired by the yetzer hatov, as the yetzer harah himself stands in the way and frustrates the mitzvah’s performance.” When Naomi saw that Ruth was struggling and grappling with her decision to join the Jewish People, as the pasuk says, “and she saw that she struggled to join her, (Ruth 1,17) Naomi recognized that Ruth’s commitment was pure and devoid of yetzer harah. When Avraham Avinu saw “a ram caught in the thicket,” he offered the animal in lieu of Yitzchak. Why, asks Rav Meir Shapiro, didn’t Avraham question his decision? Maybe it was the Satan who was trying another one of his many attempts to cause Avraham to abort the Akeidas Yitzchak! Rav Shapiro answers that because the ram was entangled and caught in the thicket, struggling to reach Avraham, this was a sure sign of the yetzer hatov since anything that is connected with the yetzer harah has no resistance or challenge.

A story is told of a distinguished talmid chacham that was raising funds in the great city of Volozhin. Everyone generously contributed except for the world-renowned tzaddik, Rav Chaim Volozhin. The town was in shock at Rav Chaim’s failure to contribute to this worthy cause, until a number of weeks passed and it was determined that the collector was in reality a missionary with ties to the local church! Rav Chaim was immediately approached and asked how he had the sensitivity to recognize the spurious nature of the fundraiser. Rav Chaim responded that he had an unusually great and powerful desire to give tzedakah to this man. Classically, one has to struggle to give away precious resources, he therefore knew that the yetzer harah was behind this charity.

The most efficient and effective way of resisting the temptations of the yetzer harah lies in our ability to unveil the many masks and camouflages of evil. Once we are successful in identifying evil, we can rest assured that the Almighty will assist us in the struggle to free ourselves from the yetzer harah’s powers.

The Torah describes the defiance of Shifra and Puah in the face of Pharaoh's command to commit infanticide of the male babies. "The midwives feared G-d and they did not do as the King of Egypt spoke to them (1:17)." Then the Torah adds what seems to be an insignificant and minor detail, "And they caused the boys to live". Rashi comments, "They provided baby food for the infants". Rav Yerucham questions: After the Torah describes the heroism of Shifra and Puah, what benefit is gleaned from the trivial fact that they fed the babies? We see from here a reality of human nature. One can only endure a challenge for a limited time. Shifra and Puah realized that they could only maintain their resolve and withstand the challenge of killing the babies for a while. After that, their defiance would wither away and they would comply with Pharaoh's wishes. The only way they could ensure their opposition would be permanent was to bond with the children, through pampering and feeding them. In that way, the children would be like their very ownand then there would no longer be a challenge whether to listen to Pharaoh or not. Even Pharaoh didn't request that the mothers kill their own children. He only asked the professional midwives, aloof and removed from any personal involvement, to precipitate the death of the babies. By feeding the children, there was no longer any temptation of listening to Pharaoh, thus totally removing the challenge.

This, I believe is a fundamental principle in maintaining equanimity in a marriage. Even if one is convinced of the necessity of domestic harmony, there is a limit to how long one can be patient in the face of constant stress and pressure. After a while, either the husband or wife will no longer be able to maintain calm in the face of the constant challenge. The only way to assure extended harmony is to remove the challenge. This is accomplished by creating a strong bond of love and respect between husband and wife. A couple cannot be satisfied living parallel lives but must create the oneness which is the product of intense love and dedication. As Shlomo HaMelech teaches, "All offenses are covered over by love (Mishlei 10:12)". We need to emulate the example of Shifra and Puah by removing the possibility of capitulating to a formidable challenge by bonding in self-effacing love. The story is told of HaGaon HaRav Yisroel Gustman zt"l who was seen in the garden of his Yeshiva in Rechavia, Yerushalayim, plucking a beautiful rose. He proceeded to place the rose in a leftover cardboard toilet paper roll. Marching upstairs, he proudly presented this gift to his Rebbetzin. Rav Gustman was one of the greatest of modern-day Roshei Yeshiva and as a young man, the Chofetz Chaim and Rav Chaim Ozer rose in deference of him. Yet, he found time to nurture and bond in love and respect with his distinguished wife. Even a great luminary like Rav Gustman understood that in order to withstand the pressures of married life it was necessary to emulate the loving lesson of Shifra and Puah.

My heartiest Mazel Tov wishes to our dear friends, Mark and Debbie Berger upon the upcoming marriage of their wonderful daughter, Sara to Aharon Dovid Singer. May they be zocheh to create a home permeated with ahava and mutual respect, in the spirit of Shifra and Puah.